For certain members in intearct club

First of all, I'm not here to share out my happiness that insists inside my heart but rather some complicated feelings. As a fact, the incoming board had been announced. Happiness,sadness,disappointing feelings all around,mixed. Well, that is not exactly my feelings. But them. Congrat for those selected as committee, and a hundred, a thousand and a million sorry for you guys that had been repulsed as a committee. World and life are always competitive and so do in our little Intearct Club. You guys are always the best! Ever! Yours' contribution and sacrifices are always more then enough , we appreciate it. You guys weren't loser. Remember, now and always. As a president, i'm sorry for all of you. I've my tasks to make the cruelest and harsh decision. Do you guys know that, how much hopes that i had been wished so that i could increase the poses in my club so that i could select let all of the form4 members as the committee. Happy ending. But reality is always the cruelest, I couldn't make this. How sad i were, when i saw a little boy from form4 was walking around in the hall, desperately. All of his friends had been selecting but left him. They are all happy, but what about he? I"M SORRY! i've to make these. i'm sorry. And the both little charming, i'm sorry too. i knew how you guys felt, but i can did nothing and help nothing. Sorry. We appreciate all of yours' efforts. Really, we really do. How happy we were when we are working together,our memories, ever.

My fault.

Today is Saturday. There should be an accounting tuition tonight but I'm sorry for skipping tuition again. How lazy i were. I'm sorry my dearest, I threw them in the tuition, my family, my dear and myself. How come a tuition could make me that emotional. I wonder why.Forgive me? ;(  For not regretting in skipping tuition, i must study properly in this 2 hours. But what will be the first? History? Science? or Economy? Hmmm, no idea. Just packing up my mood and start whatever i could. At last, I"M SORRY :(

Is it my fault for making all these toward myself?

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M'i a transparent?

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Girls are incomprehensible, are you one of them?

As what the title mentioned, girls are usually incomprehensible. Ya, honestly, I'm one of them. Usually, they seemed strong and tough outside,within their appearance. But, inside her little-inner heart, it seemed to be so fragile. May be that is not you, but it's me, myself. Girls like to represent what they hate,what they dislike as what they prefer you to do and in reversely. They prefer to say 'NO' when their heart mention "YES". I wonder why, girls have such a personalize, well, not all. They are just contradictory, they liked to make everything upside down. Ya, I can say that they are purposely to do so, as they need more from you guys, the one she believe in. They wanted to see how her loved one solve the problems that experiencing in her inner heart, they felt warm when they gain some comfort from you. Do you know it? *well, i know, it's kinda weird. Sometimes, they even emotional unreasonable, well, that is what they are. They might not need your protection in every hours,but they really need you in every seconds when they are really down. That is, a simple but an incomprehensible attitude of a girl.

I can't find a way to express myself to you anymore.

I'm sorry. Kinda sorry. I know, i have messy up your life. u dont lik it. i know that. I'm selfish. You dont like me to be too sticky with you. U liked ur new collage life , and i should distrub that much. Honestly, I've use to the life which occupied you. every night, without ur cal, i cant found a good position to sleep. I'm just dont why this will happened to me.  I've used to it. inside my heart, there was lots of things that i wanting to ask you. either you're fine or you're happy. Every night, i will miss. it had became a natural phenomena to me. talking phone with you at night was a need to me. but, you dont realize that, besides it was just a 'distrub' for u i think. I dunno who to talk to. I felt lonely honestly.i know i got a boyfriend. but we are far apart. not distance but mentally. I want to touch ur heart, wanting to see what is inside there. But u never try to touch my heart, never ever want to know what is inside there. And i, couldnt find any way to talk with u anymore. The decision being together was a wrong again to me. i regreted. i scared! i scare u will just throw me aside as u like. ignore me. neglect me. But what i can do? I'm stupid, i cant bear myself to even have a night without you. Thus, i get the result like this. I'm still child, I want to be a child. wanting to pamper with you days and nights. Hoping that you'll love care me, and let you know, I'm always wanting to be a child inside your heart.